I’m about 99% certain that the first thing people think about when they meet me isn’t, “Oh, she looks like a sarcastic, smart-mouthed bitch.” I mean, for a girl whose appearance has been likened to a Barbie (to be fair, it did have the same hair and eye color), I guess it is a bit of a far reach. I’m pale, blonde, blue-eyed, tall, and usually glasses-free, meaning that people don’t usually take me seriously until I stare deep into their soul and command them to.
I wish it worked like that.
Instead, I turn into a mix of an American Hermione Granger and a snarky, sarcastic girl who laughs at other people’s pain. Okay, maybe not that dramatic, but it’s closer to the truth than Barbie ever was. And it works way better than Barbie ever will. This hybrid girl terrifies and terrorizes anyone who stands in her way, eventually (and against all sensibility) building up some form of hatred and (I hope) grudging respect in those she bull-dozes over.
It’s been fun, being that girl, but I’m tired of hiding the other side.
I think the reason that hybrid girl even exists is because I’m afraid of what might happen if I show anything else. She makes me look tough and fearless, like a warrior disguised as a schoolgirl and ready to strike out with a handful of knives at the drop of a hat.
And I think that hybrid girl is a part of me, but there’s a whole lot more that makes up who I am. I knit, I dance, I (attempt to) sew– I’m more than just a smart brain and a sarcastic mouth. That’s why I started this blog: so I can finally be myself in front of the world.
Thanks for reading, everyone! Stay warm as we fight our way through January, and keep your eyes peeled for my next post. 😉